[轉貼]超級英文情書



贊助商連結


eros0607
2001-08-23, 09:18 PM
喜歡上王小姐後,決定要給她寫一封情書,這封情書一定要不落俗套。苦思之下,觸發了靈感,現下賣餅干說是賣克力架,做網站的想辦法上納斯達克,那我也走國際路線,寫封英文情書,扯著虎皮拉大旗,顯示一下自己的才華吧。

Dear Wang litte girl:
From see you one eye, I shit love you.
Your eyes close, I die; your eyes open, I come back to live. Your eyes close and open again and again, I die again and again.
Maybe you do not know me, no matter. One see clock emotion is pop.
I think I should introduce myself to you.
I call Li old big. Toyear 25.
My home four mouth people papa, mama, I and DD.
I beat letter very fast, because I am a computer high hand. I even act as black guest.
I do early fuck every day, so that I can have strong body to protect you.
Please come to eat and sleep with me, or I will cut my hair to be a monk ,
and find a place where many monks live in to over mylife.

Your old big.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Wang litte girl:
親愛的王小姐︰

(翻譯這句,我可費了不少心思,中文直接用 "親愛的" 未免顯得肉中有肉,麻中有麻,還是老外開放,一般朋友也可以用 dear,這樣自己的賊心可以得到滿足而又不唐突。姐想譯成 sister 吧,怕她理解成小妹,一開始就叫人小妹,我好意思開口,人家還不一定好意思應呢,把小姐譯成 little girl 我倒是沒費什麼勁,little 是小的意思,girl 就是姑娘嘛﹗)

From see you one eye, I shit love you.
自從見你第一眼,我便愛上你。

(本想寫"自從見你第一眼,我便對你魂牽夢繞",可魂牽夢繞我實在譯不出,只好寫成 "我便愛上你","便" 譯成 shit 是鄰居小孩告訴我的,他說 VCD裡 老有人說︰"shit",這個 shit 就是 "便"。)

Your eyes close, I die; your eyes open, I come back to live. Your eyes close and open again and again, I die again and again.
你的眼睛閉上,我就死了,你的眼睛睜開,我又活過來了,你眼睛眨呀眨,我就死去活來。
(哈哈,不禁有些佩服自己了,居然用這麼簡單的單詞表達了這麼深邃的意思。)

Maybe you do not know me, no matter. One see clock emotion is pop.
也許你還不認識我,沒有關係,一見鐘情很流行。
(譯一見鐘情頗費了一番功夫,一、見、情都會,但鐘字怎麼譯呢,一抬頭,見鬧鐘上寫著呢︰clock,pop 這個詞是從電視中學來的,最流行的音樂唱片就是 top of the pops,呵呵,處處留心皆學問呀。)

I think I should introduce myself to you.
我想應該介紹一下自己。
(事實証明我的英文啟蒙老師很有遠見,她說要是哪天你到了國外,要找外國 MM 套詞,就要用這句。不過,不知她有沒有想到我現下是用這句話來唬中國 MM)

I call Li old big. Toyear 25.
我叫李老大,今年 25。
(今天是 today,那麼今年是 toyear,沒有錯的吧。)

My home four mouth people papa, mama, I and DD.
我家有四口人︰爸爸、媽媽、我和弟弟。
(還好,幸虧在網上混了這麼多年,知道 GG,JJ,MM,DD 怎麼寫的。)

I beat letter very fast, because I am a computer high hand.
I even act as black guest.
我打字很快,因為我是電腦高手,我甚至還當過駭客呢。

I do early fuck every day, so that I can have strong body to protect you.
我每天都做早操,這樣我會有強壯的身體來保護你。
("操" 譯成 fuck 也是鄰居小孩告訴我的,他還說 VCD 裡就是這麼譯的,人家外國電影不會用錯的。)

Please come to eat and sleep with me, or I will cut my hair to be a monk, and find a place where many monks live in to over mylife.
請嫁給我吧,否則我將削髮為僧,找個廟來了此一生。

(實在想不起嫁字怎麼譯了,好在我腦袋靈光,嫁過來不就是和我吃住在一起嗎?禍不單行,廟字我又忘記怎麼譯了,不過這也難不倒我,好多和尚住的地方不就是廟嗎?為自己的聰明鼓掌﹗至于了此一生,打游戲時最後不是 game over 吧,over 當然就是結束啦。)

Your old big.
你的老大。
(為了表示親切,署名時我省去了姓,不過你的老大聽起來有點象黑社會的感覺,算了,不管它啦。)

好了,我的第一封英文情書就這樣隆重誕生了,看見了吧,知識就是力量,這肯定是一發攻克 MM 心城的重型炮彈,為我的好運祝福吧﹗
哦,為寫這封情書熬了一個通宵,天都亮了,該 do early fuck(做早操)去了!

贊助商連結


路邊野草3
2001-08-23, 10:53 PM
two no walk know....
偶不行了
幸好有學數學,知道偶是雙數,就用two代替
不行就用no walk
了..聽隔壁傅老頭說了不了都用know no know,
嘿嘿ㄏㄟ..偶english too no bad..